Having A Culture Shock In My Own Country: The Goa Experience
I spent a week in the sunshine state taking in its beach culture.
The realization hit me the moment I got off the trail and put my feet down on the sand at Palolem beach. There aren’t any changing rooms here!
I had made my way from my hostel to the beach barely a few metres away tucked away inside the verdant coconut grove that lined the entire stretch of beach. I had my clothes on, a tank top and a pair of shorts, along with the beach towel I had purchased that morning and my swimming trunks with the intention to change into them right on the beach itself.
However, I noticed that most beachgoers got to the beach in their swimming attire itself; bikinis, swimming trunks, briefs or shorts as there was no need for any kind of conventionalism or formalism to adhere to here.
If getting into the water or relaxing by the beach completely clothed was the unspoken rule on Indian beaches, here it was the complete opposite. Walking in your beach attire, no matter how minimal, was the rule and not the exception here. It was me completely clothed, intensely scanning the beach with my eyes in eager anticipation of some kind of changing facility, who was the odd one out here.
Women in G-strings and thongs that completely revealed their butt cheeks gaily walked right next to me with an air of confidence as we made our way from our respective hotels to the beach. They seemed to be completely in their element. Of course, not all of them were comfortable doing this. Some of them were wrapped in towels and took them off only when they got to the beach. Then there were other women sunbathers on the beach lying flat on their stomachs with their tops undone laces by the side, with nothing other than a G-String firmly tucked into their butt cheeks being the only visible piece of clothing.
If some of my conservative friends or my own parents somehow made it to this beach and ended up being a spectator to this particular sight, they’d end up having a stroke. No kidding! Most parts of India are very much still in the clutches of conservative and traditional religious orthodoxy. There are but a few pockets of the country where it is okay for men and women to dress liberally, with cosmopolitan cities constituting a major portion of those places.
The fact that the majority of dowry deaths, violence against women under the traditional arranged marriage and caste system; physical assault, mental torture, marital rape, female infanticide and foeticide in the world is happening on the very same parcel of land where tourists (and Indian women alike) were more than welcome to get into the water in their underwear and sunbathe on the beach totally naked almost made me want to throw up. The cultural dissonance was just too hard to digest.
“The fact that the majority of dowry deaths, violence against women under the traditional arranged marriage and caste system; physical assault, mental torture, marital rape, female infanticide and foeticide in the world is happening on the very same parcel of land where tourists (and Indian women alike) were more than welcome to get into the water in their underwear and sunbathe on the beach totally naked almost made me want to throw up. The cultural dissonance was just too hard to digest.”
I felt like I wasn’t in India, but in some Western country. Even the eateries, cafes, and pubs on the roads leading to the beach make you feel that way. Shirtless men, men in tank tops, women in bralettes, yoga pants, and micro mini shorts were seen sipping cocktails and socializing with each other like it was an ordinary boardwalk in the U.S. Many of them also walked on the roads that ran parallel to the beach in their swimming attire itself, casually browsing all the shops that lined the road for something of interest.
You’d be forgiven for believing you were in a western country if not for the honking, the dust and pollution, hordes of Indian tourists (fully clothed) thronging the beaches in the evenings, bad roads, and lack of footpaths on the sides.
I felt extremely shy and awkward walking in just my swimming trunks from my hostel room to the beach, openly visible to everyone who entered and exited the property including new arrivals who were fully clothed looking to check in. Of course, this feeling lasted just a day or two, and from the third day it kind of became second nature to me to walk from my hostel premises to the beach in nothing but my swimming trunks with my beach towel, phone, and room key in hand. I didn’t even bother covering the lower part of my body with the towel.
The hostel was right by the beach. What was the need for such orderliness and assiduity in the 20 meter walk that lead to it? What difference is it going to make? Everyone was going to disrobe on the beach anyway!
When all the awkwardness finally wore off, I got to the root cause of all my fears and apprehensions. In Indian society, we’re groomed and brought up with a “log kya kahenge?” (“what will people think?”) mindset all our lives. We’re always conditioned to dress and behave in conformity with traditional and cultural rules, most of which originate from religion. That’s the reason I felt so awkward and uncomfortable sharing a trail with other men and women in their sun bathing attire while making my way from my hostel to the beach. Getting semi naked on the beach itself isn’t in our culture. So you can only imagine my embarassment when I was confronted with the reality of having to walk in public settings away from the recreation area in my swimming trunks.
On the one hand, letting go of the desire to conform to extremely restrictive Indian societal rules felt extremely liberating. I no longer felt the need to micromanage my body or feel hyper concious of every inch of it for every second of the day. Traditional Indian society kind of grooms you to do this. It grooms you to be hyper conscious and hyper aware of how you look every second of the day.
Should I hold my stomach in or let my belly hang out?
Is my hair alright?
Is my skin flaky?
Is my armpit hair poking out from the sides?
Should I trim them or just let them be?
Is my package bulging out too much? (seriously!)
Thank goodness I brought my square cut briefs instead of my speedos.
“letting go of the desire to conform to conservative Indian societal rules felt extremely liberating. I no longer needed to micromanage my body or feel hyper concious of every inch of it for every second of the day. Traditional Indian society kind of grooms you to do this.”
On the other, it felt quite awkward to stand amongst total strangers in a non-recreational setting — a place that wasn’t a pool or a beach — almost naked with just the private bits minimally covered. This is what happens when we as a culture, have conditioned people to be accepting of nudity only in sexual and personal contexts.
The first few days were trying to say the least.
Here’s the thing right. We don’t have a boardwalk culture here so to speak. (We don’t even have boardwalks)
It isn’t in Indian culture to stroll around the areas surrounding a beach or a natural pool in nothing but one’s undergarments. Heck! We don’t take our clothes off even whilst inside the water. So walking in swimwear in the surrounding areas is totally out of the question. You might have come across many documentaries on Youtube or on TV depicting Indian beaches with all the beachgoers dressed to the nines including the ones inside the water. Yes, that’s how it actually is all over the country. Except in places like Goa.
So why don’t most Indian women wear bikinis or other swimwear on the beach?
Let’s start with the fact that, in principle, it is inconvenient for Indians to show their body. This situation is gradually changing, but for now it is a reality. This is probably the biggest reason why we prefer to just get our feet wet on the beach rather than go swimming.
Even when we splash, we dip fully clothed and dry ourselves on the sand. We rarely go to the sea by car or travel long distances to spend a day at the beach in India.
The only time we culturally accept being remotely close to naked or having some piece of clothing off our bodies is whilst we’re inside a water body or are indulging in some kind of adventure activity. And even there too, one is supposed to get dressed the moment they are done with that activity lest they get “caught” roaming around in their undergarments. Shame shame puppy shame!
Even at theme parks, we get into the water fully clothed as can be clearly discerned from the following video:
This is in stark contrast to the Western culture I encountered at Goa and what I saw on Youtube videos of walking on ‘boardwalks’ of beaches in Western countries.
The videos came as an even bigger shock to me. Women (and some men too) in thongs, bikinis, and G-strings happily walked, skated, jogged, or cycled on boardwalks, leisurely sipped coffee at open air cafes, or waited in line for ice cream with their butt cheeks completely exposed to everyone around. A few women wore micro bikinis, the ones that only covered the nipples, leaving the rest of the breast completely exposed.
I mean at this point, do you even need a separate nudist beach specifically to get naked? You’re just three eye patches away from being completely nude anyway.
Now I’m not demanding we start clothing optional beaches in India or anything of the sort, but at least the freedom to get into the water in just swimming shorts for men, and a sports bra and shorts for women. I myself don’t like being fully clothed on the beach and wish there was one closer to home — and not just one that’s a 14 hour train ride away — where I could just go sunbathe in my swimming trunks without judgement or body shaming remarks from anyone.
What do you think about Goa’s beaches? Is it an oasis of liberal expression for women in a land beset with patriarchal codes of conduct and deep rooted misogyny? Or just a rich persons playground where the religious, political, and culture fanatics are willing to look the other way because of the tourism money machine that it is?
Do let us know in the comments bar to the side.
